Would our lives be better without the Instagram app?
There's so many ways Instagram positively adds to my life -- I love creating. I love connecting. I love sharing. I love what Instagram was originally intended to do. The countless relationships I've developed with friends all over the states and abroad -- are priceless. I would've never met one of my closest friends had it not been for our love of fashion and sharing our passions on Instagram over six years ago.
A close friend and I connected last year and text almost every single day. We just recently started sharing how Instagram can makes us feel. At times, it's wonderfully inspiring -- a beautiful escape -- and honestly, fun. Other times it feels daunting, filled with toxic comparison and a huge source of anxiety. We talk about generations before us -- and how the lack of technology created a world of oblivious happiness. A world where no one could get a hold of you unless you were at home or at work. No one expected an immediate call back, a social media post or a text within minutes of initial correspondence. Of course, I'm sure there was comparison in their own circles of friends, but certainly not to the magnitude we see and experience today.
For the most part, I have a decent relationship with social media. If I need a break, I take it. If I need to lean into my creativity, I do. But there are moments when I get so wrapped up in what other people are doing, achieving and creating, that I feel like I'm getting left in the dust. That my ideas and dreams of sharing all I want to, will somehow pass me by if I don't do everything -- all of it -- right now. In the past when this would happen, I'd try to reach for it all at once, resulting in never finishing any of the things I reached for, or doing everything I reached for but on a mediocre level. I'm not sure which one made me feel worse. I'm still learning to slow down and take inspiration and ideas as they come. I make lists and plan and enjoy the process. I love reminding myself of this quote, because up to this point in my life, it's been unbelievably true...
What is meant for you will not pass you by.
The reality is, we need breaks from practically every constant in our lives. Our jobs, maybe a particular friendship, and yes, even our loved ones from time to time. But what Megan and I discussed just a few days ago was the realization that in life, we aren't going to enjoy the emotions that many situations bring to light within us -- that it's not just in this strange realm of social media. Trust me, if it's not comparison and insecurity within the Instagram world, give it time and we'll likely find it elsewhere. Social media just happens to be in our face 24/7 (if we allow it to be). And if social media is causing such unrest within us, then we know it's time to look inward, put our phones down for a few hours, and get back to the simple act of being fully present. Just the other day we went to see Carson's grandmother and went for a walk. She said to me,
Many children these days are growing up, they aren't being raised.
Her statement got me thinking. We are distracted. If we aren't careful, we will allow the attachment to our phones become a detachment from our children. And if you don't have children, just replace the words "our children" in the previous sentence with anything that's important to you. If we don't practice our boundaries when it comes to screen time, one day we will look up and regret not taking in the important moments when they were right in front of us.
I'd like to share another quick story before signing off. Just the other day I was looking at Instagram, admiring everyone else's kitchen remodels (I've had a strong distaste for our countertops since before we moved in haha) and I started to feel that empty, longing feeling inside. I decided to put my phone down, then I looked at my daughter while she was eating her afternoon snack. She started telling me all about her time at school and her friends and the things she's learning. The brightness in her eyes and the excitement in her voice melted away every ounce of those negative feelings. The things Meriwether was sharing are the very most important things.
So, do I think my life would be better without the Instagram app? I think for me, all in all, no. Because Instagram is not the root issue. If only we would carve out the time in each day to stop and look around us, taking inventory of all we are blessed with, the anxiety and comparisons would simply dissolve into the background. These feelings would become meaningless when we evaluate the important things in the present moment.
Contentment is found within a grateful heart.
The real solution here is to practice our boundaries, as imperfect as they may be, so we can enjoy all of life's corners. And most important, being immediately reflective on all the positive blessings life has offered us when we start to have those negative thoughts and feelings. I'm choosing to focus on the wonderful aspects of the app, while maintaining a gratuitous attitude. I think if we can do that, we will all feel a lot better. So from now on, when I see a kitchen remodel I love, instead of envy, I can feel only inspired, because I have a kitchen. One that holds precious, unique memories of laughing and dancing and eating with my family. If we can combat the negative feelings with gratuitous ones, we can all be open to enjoying the wonderful opportunities in every avenue of life, Instagram included.
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